|
I would like to dedicate this article to MikeC and JoeyD for sticking with me and supporting me when life in my presence got hard. Six years ago I was walking down a dirt path with a friend, talking. We were talking about connection and belonging. Why does someone go to the other side of the world to find it? I'm not sure, but what I do know is that this conversation was a key part of my own journey of realization and understanding about my own sense of connection and belonging. I am very grateful for the opportunities I've had on my journey searching in this area. Here is my story so far. I spent 12 years in the military and never felt connection or belonging. I struggled with this as a child too; often a lack of connection and belonging is a reason why people join the military (Dixon, 2011). Among other reasons, this was the case for me too. At the core of my sense of disconnection and lack of belonging was a sense of groundlessness. I lacked understanding of where I came from and my part in life's cycle. I had no awareness of and wasn’t comfortable with my cultural identity and I did not value or love myself. The definition of personal cultural identity I’m using here is “a critical piece of my identity (and worldview) that develops as I absorb, interpret, and adopt (or reject) the beliefs, values, behaviours, and norms of the communities in my life” (Wilson, 2023). When I was younger, we used to have culture days at school where we were encouraged to bring or discuss a dish unique to our culture. I remember asking what culture was. My Mom would say: "Apple pie is our cultural dish because we are Canadian", or "perogies is part of our cultural heritage", because my grandmother was from Austria. I understood this definition of culture at face value. I didn't ask to go out and harvest apples to make pie. I didn’t ask to make perogies as a family. I didn’t ask for stories about my parents or relatives. I didn’t ask about our history or connection with the land. I didn't realize the significance of my lack of understanding of my own culture and where I came from. I just felt this lack of understanding; I felt rudderless and lonely even around people who loved me. I left the military in 2017 discouraged that my efforts to find a sense of belonging and connectedness were not fulfilled. Although military culture is a much more team-oriented culture than mainstream Canadian society (English, 2004; Hofstede Insights, 2022), my efforts to fit in didn’t materialize in a sense of belonging and connectedness. But the military culture is one of uniformity as well (McDonald & Parks 2012). True membership is reflective of how well I could fit into the military mold. Ultimately, the military culture is not a great environment for self-discovery or developing an understanding of where I came from. Nor is it a positive environment where I could become my own self as part of a collective if I didn’t already have a strong sense of myself. Luckily, unbeknown to me at the time, my relationship with yoga would be the key to understanding what I was missing. My yogic journey started in 2008 when a friend suggested I go to a yoga class with them. Yoga has been part of my life ever since. The pandemic in 2020 led me to start an online yoga practice and I shifted away from practising a Western style yoga to the more historically traditional yoga style of Northern India. I gravitated to this new practice, although I wasn't sure why. My daily yoga practice kept me going and helped me to be more positive. I had always been a fairly active person and initially I assumed that yoga was a communal activity, done with others to create a serene environment and stimulate blood flow for good health. And it is, but it's so much more than that. My most important yogic learning thus far is that of letting go of what’s flying around in my head and feeling the backdrop of myself, my spirit. With this daily guidance, my life started changing in really positive ways. Books, groups and courses showed up that encouraged a turning inward instead of looking outside for a sense of belonging and connectedness. For example, One Drum: Stories and Ceremonies for a Planet, a book by Richard Wagamese, presents Indigenous cultural rituals to inspire grounding. The untethered soul, a book by Michael A. Singer, teaches to release our mind’s chatter and observe behind this noise. The great work of your life, a course created and facilitated by Stephen Cope of Kripalu Yoga Center, emphasizes the importance of meditation for realizing purpose. I’ve found when I make the time to focus quietly inside, I feel my unique self peacefully reflecting the outside magnificence that is the living earth. In 2022 I was fortunate to work for AgentsC; a consulting company focused on supporting non-profits to improve their funding and inclusivity. Blessed, at this point in my life, to be listening to myself more, I was able to be more open and a little more connected to others. I had the opportunity to attend the Path to Action Conference focused on the dynamics of race in our everyday life. It was here that I acutely realized there was a relationship between culture and connectedness and belonging. Growing up in a Canadian suburban secular household with no extended family and then choosing to move into a military culture that didn't foster exploration and curiosity, I had grown up believing that what I could do was the only value I had. Where I was from, what I was a part of, and who I was, was not valuable. But like Sandra Perron says, "we are not human doings, we are human beings" (Perron, S., personal communication, October 7, 2022). Knowing myself better now, my passion for environmental sustainability is no surprise. Maintaining a positive relationship with all living beings is of utmost value to me in the same way that I now value a positive and loving relationship with myself, my environment and my cultural heritage. I am able to be still, quiet, look inwards and I am continually learning to be at home knowing that I am connected to everything when both my mind and especially my heart are curious and open. "I am part of the divine light and the divine light is part of me" - Yogrishi Vishvketu - Namaste References and ideas for further exploration****I recognize that this list of references below are not in perfect APA format and it includes references to material not mentioned in the text. My objective is to try to make everything as accessible as possible if desired by the reader (and for my reference later too!) Akhanda Yoga Institute youtube channel has hundreds of yoga classes available for free that promote groundedness and overall well being. Accessible here: https://www.youtube.com/@AkhandaYogaOfficial AnimaLeadership, The White Leader's Lab – A Community of Practice, a course created and facilitated by AnimaLeadership accessible here: https://animaleadership.com/ Part of this course has participants compare and contrast the difference and meaning between inheritance and cultural heritage. Of interest to me here is the second son phenomena (National Museum of American History, 2023); immigrants leaving an English culture that supports only the eldest son gaining status and material wealth culturally emphasizes a undervaluing of human beings offspring of second son immigrants. Braiding Sweetgrass, a book by Robin Wall Kimmerer, tells the story of the human need to be connected with the land. Dixon, N. F., Dixon, M. (2011). On The Psychology Of Military Incompetence. United Kingdom: Random House. English, A. (2004). Understanding Military Culture - A Canadian Perspective. McGill-Queen’s University Press. Accessed Google preview from: https://books.google.ca/books?id=YfbKdmpgWHMC&printsec=frontcover&source=gbs_ViewAPI&redir_esc=y#v=onepage&q&f=false Hofstede Insights. (2022). What about Canada? Canadian culture through the lens of the 6-D Model©. Accessed from here: https://www.hofstede-insights.com/country/canada/ Insight Timer app: Remember your worth. Accessed here: https://insig.ht/dLUaPEH14xb McDonald, D.P. & Parks, K.M. (2012). Managing Diversity in the Military - The value of inclusion in a culture of uniformity. New York, NY. Routledge Taylor and Francis Group. Midnight Sweatlodge, a book by Waubgeshig Rice, talks of an ancient Indigenous culture steeped in community support as a practice that fosters healing of struggling community members. National Museum of American History. (2023). New Societies - Jamestown, Québec, Santa Fe: Three North American Beginnings accessed here: https://americanhistory.si.edu/jamestown-quebec-santafe/en/new-societies The Path to Action Conference 2022 vision was to help those in attendance cultivate a path to a more just and equal community and society where freedom from all forms of oppression ultimately prevails. Access conference details here: https://pathtoaction.org/ The Pepper Pod is a place and space that welcomes all veterans and their families in support of their journey developing a new chapter in their life or to help them heal a little if that’s what they need. Access more information here: https://pepperpod.ca/en/ Wilson. V. (2023). What is Cultural Identity and Why is it Important?. Exponential Futures Inc. Accessed here: https://www.exceptionalfutures.com/cultural-identity/  Design credit: Aruna
0 Comments
In the last several months, I’ve been inspired to reconsider what my work could look like in a post pandemic environment. There are options to work remotely and with that option there are opportunities! Maybe you’re thinking about moving to be closer to family or to a more remote location and want to keep your job or maybe you want to travel and work at the same time!  My inuksuk in Halifax Nova Scotia I’ve moved to several cities across Canada for different reasons over the last 15 years. I found myself moving to British Columbia back in 2009 with a sense of adventure having never lived on the west coast of Canada (I am an Ontario lady). I also found myself moving to Alberta in 2018 for a job. Although both moves had very different objectives and I felt differently about both of them, I ended up pursuing similar ways to feel connected. Even in a COVID-touched world where masks might be the new norm for some time, there will be opportunities to explore and connect with others. If you find yourself moving to a new city to take advantage of an opportunity, here are a few tips I’ve learned and practice to feel more at home.  Digging Ground Water Monitoring Wells in Wainwright Alberta (drilling rig) 1. Walk or jog/run around your new city as soon as you canI have found walking or jogging is slower than driving (and healthier than sitting in a car). When I’m moving slower, I’m able to take in more of my surroundings and get a good sense of the area. After my move to Barrie Ontario from Victoria British Columbia in 2015, I was surprised at all the hidden trails, beautiful waterfront, cool shops that I found when jogging around that I would likely not have seen if I hadn’t been on foot. I would go out and enjoy those same trails again when I needed to connect with nature and relax. I would feel connected to people in the community when I knew the places locals were referring to in conversation and I would feel good sharing my first hand experience.  Out exploring with Joey on the trails outside of town
|
RSS Feed
